No Masamune!
by KolKolPot
Summary: Well, I guess we've come to an end. The final chapter has been put up. If you want the sequel review a nice review. PG13 due to violence and bad language.
1. The story begins

NO MASAMUNE!  
  
When Crono, Frog and Marle go to Magus' castle Frog forgets his Masamune! Will the 3 survive? Read on to find out. Disclaimer- I do not own Chrono Trigger, I'm just a fan writing a fanfic. It was quite long ago when I did Magus' castle, so don't expect this to be spot on.  
  
Chapter 1- The Story begins.  
  
Zzz.  
  
Marle: Crono, wake up. There's a visitor for you.  
  
Pingu: Revenge!  
  
Crono: AAARRRGGGHHH! The author doesn't own Pingu! Hey. It was a dream!  
  
?: Revenge!  
  
Crono: AAARRRGGGHHH!  
  
Frog: Shut up! I'm trying to make a speech to say in front of Magus!  
  
Crono: Sorry, I thought you were Pingu.  
  
Frog grabs Crono and bangs his head on the floor.  
  
Frog: Do I look like an animal?  
  
Crono: Well. Yeah.  
  
Frog holds his fist above Crono's face and-  
  
Frog: Oh. Of course.  
  
Frog cries.  
  
Crono: Oh come on, being a Frog isn't all that bad, is it?  
  
Frog: No its (sniff) not that.  
  
Crono: Then what is it?  
  
Frog: Marle (sniff) dumped me.  
  
Crono: (Yes!)  
  
Marle: No that was Crono!  
  
Frog: Yes!  
  
Crono: (NO!)  
  
Marle: Only joking, I dumped both of you MUAHAHA!  
  
Frog and Crono: NOOO! Revenge!  
  
Crono: AAARRRGGGHHH!  
  
Frog: ON MARLE!  
  
Crono: Phew.  
  
Crono and Frog charge towards Marle.  
  
Marle: Oh Frank!  
  
The Innkeeper comes along. (They were in the Inn).  
  
Frank: Err. You called?  
  
Marle: Ahem!  
  
Frank lifts off his hat to show his white hair and pulls up his sleeve to reveal a hairy, muscular arm.  
  
Frog: Come on then big guy!  
  
Frank gives Frog a "don't mess with me" look, and then he does the same to Crono.  
  
Crono: What the hell did I do?  
  
Frank: You plan revenge-  
  
Crono: AAARRRGGGHHH!  
  
Frank: On Frank-  
  
Crono: YES!  
  
Frank: (In a vicious voice) YOU DARE YOU DIE!  
  
Frog and Chrono: We don't dare!  
  
Frog: Copycat!  
  
Frank: You don't die then.  
  
They go to the castle.  
  
Frog: Wait a second. I forgot my masamune!  
  
Frank: Umm. Bankrupt. Sold sword.  
  
Frog: NOO! FIRSTLY YOU SOLD THE ONE AND ONLY MASAMUNE, WHICH JUST HAPPENED TO BE MINE, AND THEN YOU REMIND ME OF AYLA!  
  
Frank: Ayla. No know Ayla. Ayla no-no know.  
  
Marle: Hey how does Frog know about Ayla?  
  
Frog: Uh. Crono told me.  
  
Crono: I did?  
  
Frog winks at Crono in an "I'll tell Marle" way.  
  
Crono: Oh yeah I did, didn't I! (Don't you dare you stupid amphibian!)  
  
Frog: I can't fight the great Magus without the Masamune!  
  
Frank: Um. sell it to idiot. Idiot bend it. Broken Sword. No Sword.  
  
Frog: Bloody hell! I need a new weapon!  
  
Frank picks up a stick.  
  
Frank: Uh. Big stick.  
  
Frog: It's a bit big. but it'll do.  
  
Frog's theme song plays. Frog starts dancing groovily.  
  
Crono: Get on with it!  
  
Frog: Ok.  
  
The team go through the door and go up both rooms with the weird ghosts then back into the middle place and touch the sparkly thing. Ozzie appears.  
  
Ozzie: Yeah, dig it man, the diggers are rather busy right now, so you'll have to beat Flea the Flea and Slash who looks rather like me! And the 2 monsters and the 98 other monsters of Magus' castle.  
  
A few monsters appear.  
  
Frank: Frank.  
  
Frank lobs the monsters into the bin.  
  
Frog: Ok so the plan now is next- TO BE CONTINUED. 


	2. Monsters of Magus' castle

NO MASAMUNE!  
  
When Crono, Frog and Marle go to Magus' castle Frog forgets his Masamune! Will the 3 survive? Read on to find out. Disclaimer- I do not own Chrono Trigger, I'm just a fan writing a fanfic. It was quite long ago when I did Magus' castle, so don't expect this to be spot on.  
  
Chapter 2- Monsters of Magus' castle.  
  
Frog: Ok so the plan now is next we fight Slash!  
  
Crono: Well done!  
  
Frog: Come on then!  
  
Crono: Well.  
  
Frog: Well?  
  
Crono: WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR!  
  
Frog: YOU!  
  
Crono: Hey we aren't waiting for me are we Marle?  
  
Marle: Well. Actually we are.  
  
Crono: No!  
  
Frank: Agree with small one. Wait for Crono-ing.  
  
Frog: You mean waiting for Crono.  
  
Frank: (Viciously) I MEAN WHAT I SAY!  
  
Frog: (Swiftly) SORRY!  
  
Crono: Let's go and fight Slash then.  
  
Frog: Don't feel like it!  
  
Crono: Well too bad!  
  
Frog: Can't you swap my place with Robo or Lucca?  
  
Crono: No it's one of those annoying parts of the game where we have to take YOU!  
  
Frog: Well we always have to take YOU!  
  
Crono: Not when I die!  
  
Frog: You die?  
  
Crono: Something like that, I saw it in a strategy guide, you see.  
  
Frog: OK (YES!)  
  
Marle: OH NO LOOK AT THE TIME  
  
1:59:04  
  
Marle: I need to call Jim!  
  
Frog: Who's Jim?  
  
Marle: My. Friend.  
  
Frog gasps.  
  
Frog: HORROR!  
  
Marle: Crono don't you have your phone on you?  
  
Crono: Well yeah-  
  
Marle snatches the phone.  
  
Marle: Thanks! Tee hee!  
  
Crono: Whatever.  
  
Marle takes a few hours on the phone.  
  
Crono: BLOODY HELL LOOK AT MY PHONEBILL!  
  
Crono faints.  
  
Frog: So, is this the part of the game where he dies?  
  
Marle: I don't know I lost my script!  
  
Frog: Hey that's not in the script!  
  
Marle: What so you do have the script?  
  
Frog: No, I just felt like saying it.  
  
Marle: Anyway let's go and whip Slash!  
  
Frog: What about Crono?  
  
Marle: Uh. REVENGE!  
  
Crono jumps up.  
  
Crono: AAARRRGGGHHH! Hey that was a nasty trick!  
  
Marle: Let's go and fight Slash!  
  
Crono: OK!  
  
Frog: OK!  
  
Crono: NOW LOOK WHO THE COPYCAT IS!  
  
Frog: Oh get bon with it!  
  
They go into the room with Slash in it and Frank lobs the skeletons somewhere or another.  
  
Frog: It's been a long time, Sir Slush Puppy!  
  
Slash: Still quite the comedian, Ben, and anyway the author doesn't even own Slush Puppy so stuff it! If Cyrus wasn't there to help you wouldn't be standing right now, no actually you would but you'd be lobbed somewhere by your freaky boyfriend.  
  
Frog: No that's Marle's boyfriend.  
  
Frank: That is?  
  
Marle pukes.  
  
Marle: Jim is my boyfriend Frank's just my bodyguard!  
  
Crono: You spent ALL my credit on your BOYFRIEND?  
  
Marle: So?  
  
Crono: Oh well let's fight Slash.  
  
Frog: Do Dee Do!  
  
Crono: What?  
  
Frog: It's the boss music!  
  
Crono: No, the boss music is more like this, sing it boys!  
  
Some men come in and play the boss music.  
  
Marle: Ooh, single boys!  
  
Crono: Uh oh, Jim never hung up!  
  
Phone: Marle, you're DUMPED!  
  
Marle: NOOO!  
  
Crono: Gutted!  
  
Marle: Lets fight Slash!  
  
Frog: How many times has that been said today?  
  
Marle: How am I supposed to know?  
  
Frog: Just thought you would.  
  
The battle starts. Frank charges at Slash but gets thrown out a double glazed window.  
  
Crono: Uh oh!  
  
The music playing men beat Slash up.  
  
Marle: Thanks boys!  
  
Men: Huh.  
  
Slash picks up his Slasher.  
  
Slash: This'll do me a world of hamburgers!  
  
Hamburgers start falling everywhere. Eventually Slash dies of shock because a hamburger falls on his head. Marle, Crono and Frog get experience and tech points even though they didn't do anything and the men get music points. Crono picks up the Slasher and equips it to himself.  
  
Crono: Ooh it fits!  
  
Frog: To Flea!  
  
Frog, Crono, Marle and the men go to Flea's room and whip the fake Flea.  
  
Flea: Blah blah!  
  
The men beat him/her.  
  
Frog: To-  
  
Crono: Magus?  
  
Marle: No, continued duh! 


	3. Final Fight

NO MASAMUNE!  
  
When Crono, Frog and Marle go to Magus' castle Frog forgets his Masamune! Will the 3 survive? Read on to find out. Disclaimer- I do not own Chrono Trigger, I'm just a fan writing a fanfic. It was quite long ago when I did Magus' castle, so don't expect this to be spot on.  
  
Chapter 3.  
  
Frog: To-  
  
Crono: Be continued!  
  
Marle: No, Magus duh!  
  
Crono: Ah! When am I going to get it right!  
  
Frog: How about never!  
  
Crono starts crying.  
  
Marle: Revenge!  
  
Crono jumps.  
  
Crono: NOOOO!  
  
Marle: Tee hee! It never gets boring!  
  
Frog: Heh. I know. REVENGE!  
  
Crono: PACK IT IN!  
  
Frog gets out a suitcase and starts putting revenge in it.  
  
Crono: Lets just go and fight Magus!  
  
Marle: No!  
  
Crono: Please?  
  
Marle: OK!  
  
Crono, Marle and Frog start moving their puny little 32 bit graphic bodies towards the door. However, the music men have 128 bit graphic bodies, cool!  
  
Frog: It's Ozzie!  
  
Ozzie: HA! You can't kiss me when I'm like this!  
  
Crono starts throwing Pokemon cards at the thingies so Ozzie falls through the floor.  
  
Ozzie: HOW CAN THIS BE! THE AUTHOR DOESN'T EVEN OWN POKEMON!  
  
Crono: Piece of Cake!  
  
The music men start playing cool music and Crono starts dancing groovily.  
  
Frog: get on with it!  
  
Crono: Whatever  
  
The crew keeps walking until they get to Magus. After one of them annoying anime clips they're fighting him.  
  
Magus: Let me enjoy my Slim Fast in peace!  
  
Marle: NEVER!  
  
Magus: FINE I'LL FIGHT YOU!  
  
Crono: You may beat Frog, you may beat Marle but you'll never beat me!  
  
Magus: FIRE100  
  
Crono: Shit! I never knew that existed!  
  
Crono falls.  
  
Marle: NOW GET A TASTE OF YOUR OWN MEDICINE!  
  
Magus: Huh?  
  
Marle: ICE0!  
  
Magus: .What happened?  
  
Marle: .Nothing.  
  
Magus: GUTTED! BOLT0.5  
  
Marle: Crap! So weak. yet. so. strong.  
  
Marle falls on top of Crono.  
  
The music men get thrown out the window for farting.  
  
Magus: Who next? Oh yeah, sticky the bush Frog-a-roo.  
  
Frog: I. lost. the. Masamune.  
  
Magus: Bloody hell! You came without the freaking MASAMUNE! Now you're in for it! Ah well, I'll let you warm up first, ICE0.1  
  
Frog has 1 health point left.  
  
Magus: HA! BEAT THAT!  
  
Frog: I. can't.  
  
Magus: Chicken! Oops sorry I meant frog!  
  
Frog is crawling up to Magus, struggling to lift his stick.  
  
Magus: FROG! FROG! FROG!  
  
Frog takes one final pull towards Magus and only just manages to tap Magus on the end of his new Nike trainers.  
  
Magus: What? The owner doesn't own Nike, how did you beat me? NOOO!  
  
Magus talks about Lavos while serving tea to the trio then the trio appear in prehistoric time somehow.  
  
Ayla comes in wearing a baseball cap, a t-shirt with a hoodie and baggy yellow trousers.  
  
Ayla: Radical, dudes! How you been!  
  
Frog: Uh, great thanks!  
  
Ayla: Well, man, I got this video, sort of behind the scenes of your radical adventure, lets watch it man!  
  
Frog: Uh. sure!  
  
Ayla: Movie 1- Crono and Pingu.  
  
Crono is staring at Pingu across a poker table.  
  
Pingu: Mep mep! 20 quid, mep!  
  
Crono: That's babies money!  
  
Crono stares at Pingu.  
  
Crono: I.O.U 10007635678953765345589854537690980.89gil  
  
Pingu grins.  
  
Crono: Bring it on!  
  
Pingu nods.  
  
Crono: I deal!  
  
Crono deals.  
  
Crono: Hmm. I'll get rid of this, this and this.  
  
Pingu: Mep, mep and mep.  
  
Crono: WHAT? PAIR OF TWOS?  
  
Pingu: Mep! ROYAL FLUSH!  
  
Pingu scoops up the 20 gil and the I.O.U.  
  
Crono: Pay you tomorrow!  
  
Pingu: Goodnight!  
  
Crono and Pingu go to sleep. Crono wakes up and starts to walk away; Pingu hears footsteps and follows Crono.  
  
Crono: Yes! I got to the cliff!  
  
Pingu: Forgot to pay something!  
  
Crono jumps and turns around.  
  
Crono: Pingu? YOU CAN BLOODY TALK!  
  
Pingu: 10007635678953765345589854537690980.89gil please!  
  
Crono: How about. NO!  
  
Pingu gets out a massive sword.  
  
Pingu: 10007635678953765345589854537690980.89gil NOW!  
  
Crono looks around and after deciding there's no way out he jumps off the cliff.  
  
Pingu: Don't worry, when I say revenge I mean taking away your lemon flavoured cough sweet!  
  
Crono's face suddenly turned into a crying conundrum.  
  
Crono: Why did I do that? I love my lemon cough sweet more than anything. and now it could be stolen.  
  
Crono is now shown holding the camcorder.  
  
Crono: Ever since that day,  
  
I was brave and ran away,  
  
Now my world my life my love,  
  
Could be stolen from above,  
  
That's the day that I will die,  
  
And Pingu's laughing will fill the sky,  
  
Now every time I hear that word,  
  
I'll be cautious like a nervous bird,  
  
Revenge is the last word I want to hear,  
  
Nothing can cheer me up now not even beer,  
  
Now my life is drawing to an end,  
  
I'll try to make a little bend,  
  
So I'll never have to hear that word,  
  
Or be cautious like a nervous bird,  
  
I won't lose my love my life my world,  
  
And then I'll be able to sleep warm and curled.  
  
End.  
  
Crono: .It's true.  
  
Marle: Oh Crono, why didn't you tell me?  
  
Crono: .  
  
Ayla: Who gives a damn? Let's get on with this lot of Spam!  
  
Ayla: Movie 2- Frog knows Ayla / I'll tell Marle  
  
Frog: Joe, you know what? I'm bored of sitting around here being bored, I want an adventure!  
  
Joe: Dude! I know where!  
  
Frog: Show me!  
  
Joe takes Frog to the end of the time and to Prehistoric time. After getting to Ayla's hut, Frog peeps inside.  
  
Crono: It's Marle's favourite piece of paper, it means the world to her, but who gives a damn.  
  
Ayla: Ayla think funny that!  
  
Frog: CRONO! YOU'RE GIVING AWAY MARLE'S FAVOURITE PIECE OF PAPER! I KNOW MARLE BECAUSE I SAW YOUR VIDEO ABOUT YOU AND MARLE!  
  
Crono: F-F-F-FROG? PLEASE DON'T TELL HER I'LL DO ANYTHING!  
  
Frog: BE MY SLAVE!  
  
Crono: Whatever.  
  
After Crono starts his slave work Joe crawls into the hut.  
  
End.  
  
Crono: .I'm afraid that's also true.  
  
Marle: Ah who gives a damn!  
  
Ayla: Movie 3- The Masamune / the Black and White legend of the Broken Sword.  
  
Frank gives an idiot a Masamune.  
  
Idiot / Lucca: Gee, thanks!  
  
Lucca starts experimenting with the sword and then snaps it.  
  
Lucca: How interesting. Bye!  
  
End.  
  
Frog: LUCCA'S REALLY IN FOR IT!  
  
Crono: Yeah. Whatever.  
  
Ayla: Movie 4- Frog saw the video.  
  
Frog: Huh? What's this?  
  
Frog watches the video with a Video player and TV made out of gravel and sticks.  
  
Crono: Marle's a good friend, here's her favourite piece of paper, in fact, I hope she's single, heh!  
  
Marle: What did you say Crono?  
  
Crono: Oh. Nothing.  
  
Crono throws the video away.  
  
Frog: Oh, I see he's making friends!  
  
End.  
  
Crono: What? I don't remember throwing that away!  
  
Marle: CRONO!!!  
  
Crono: Now she's mad!  
  
Ayla: Peace!  
  
Marle: .Ok.I'll stay calm.for a while.  
  
Ayla: Dude. I know there was a fifth video.  
  
A boy not much taller than a broomstick wearing a blue baseball cap with a yellow t-shirt and hoodie and baggy purple trousers with chains attached entered the room.  
  
Joe: Sorry, man, just editing, oh, it's you lot.  
  
Frog: Joe!  
  
Crono: Do I know you?  
  
Marle: I don't think I do.  
  
Joe: Course you do man!  
  
Ayla: You got the video bro?  
  
Joe: Course, man!  
  
Ayla: Pass!  
  
Joe: Here you go bro!  
  
Ayla: The fifth and final movie- Joe's Story  
  
Joe: Well, first I lived with Frog, talking away. A while after that I took him to prehistoric time, and when I saw Ayla, I thought she's be a great bro, that's what I call a close mate, so I made her talk my dude language until she could sing it out fluently. After we tried to stop an evil pterodactyl eating us I was blown away to Magus' Castle, I decided to help out as a music man and now my greatest ambition is to join Frog, Marle, Crono and Ayla to make a great team and destroy evil, including Lavos, make a better future man. After being thrown and blown away by Magus when I was a music man I came back to prehistoric time, well, I guess it's my home until I fulfil my greatest ambition, make peace man, make a better future. Batteries out man, hope to see you soon, man.  
  
End.  
  
Crono: Wow. That's your ambition. What do you think Marle?  
  
Marle: I think we're going to need all the help we can get to destroy Lavos, Frog?  
  
Frog: Excellent! A five part team! Maybe Robo and Lucca will help out too!  
  
Crono: I thought you hated Lucca?  
  
Frog: But we're going to need all the help we can get!  
  
Crono: All right Froggy!  
  
Frog: Great, you guys in?  
  
Crono: Yes!  
  
Marle: Yes!  
  
Joe: Yes!  
  
Ayla: Yes!  
  
Frog: Yes!  
  
Crono: But now Magus is out. what do we do next?  
  
Frog: Are you sure he's down and out? Are you sure the author won't be working on a sequel to this story?  
  
Magus: I bet he will. Heh heh. MUAHAHAHA!  
  
The End. For now. 


End file.
